Kids Want To Know

For over 20 years Watkins has been honestly trying to answer kids' questions. He began when he and his wife were residents in graduate school. Students would come up to them and ask questions about life that Watkins sought answers for.

In compiling his book Watkins says he surveyed 2,500 teens in junior high and high school. Since most of the kids were in the public schools, they had questions that most normal Christian parents wouldn't think about.

Of today's Top 10 questions that teens ask about love and sexuality, the number one response when they asked nearly 1,000 junior and senior high students is: When can I start dating?

The answer to this question is preceded by others, such as: "Do youhave a good self-concept?" "Do you know who you really are?" "Do you have strong self-confidence?"

A good self-concept gives you confidence. "Do you have good social contacts?" The best dates occur between "just good friends." When you date friends, you have freedom to be yourself. Watkins's suggestion: Put off going steady until after high school.

Some practical benefits of this idea is that your life will be enriched by a variety of relationships; and it's a lot easier to keep sexually pure if you hold off on steady relationships until later. "Are you in control sexually?"

Dating at a later age allows time for teens to mature emotionally. Studies show that the later a teenage girl dates, the less likely she is to engage in premarital sex. With maturity comes a stronger self-concept, greater self-confidence, more social contacts, and better sexual control. Talk with your parents about the right time to start dating.

Talk To Your Kids

Watkins counsels parents to talk to their kids. He says 7 percent of U.S. parents talk to their kids about sexuality. If parents aren't talking to their kids, who is?

Watkins says at his speaking engagements he gets the best responses from older people who say they wish they'd known these things when they were young. Watkins's goal is to give parents the tools they need to talk to their kids.

Watkins has two children and says that as they grew he attempted to answer their questions according to their age.

In today's world kids are battling many problems. The self-abuse, mutilation, and pain in a young person's life are tough. Living in a fallen world is tough.

One reason Watkins says he elected to stop speaking in public schools is because, after seeing so much pain in young people's lives, he was frustrated when he was unable to offer them Christ as the answer.

We live in a fallen world. Sex is such a minefield because sex is a symbol of the relationship that God wants with His people. That's why Satan attacks marriage and sex, why he attacks us.